This year, for the first time, I forgot how old I was. I’m 35 today, but if you asked me one week ago I would have put money on turning 34. (Definitely lost that bet with my husband.)

In my 20s, 35 seemed like such a significant age, and dare I say it… “old”. But now I’m here, it doesn’t feel “scary”, or “significant” or “old”… it just feels damn good!

In no logical order whatsoever, here’s 35 lessons I’ve learned in life thus far. 

1. The things and people that make you light up when you talk about them—those are the things that matter. 

2. It’s okay to aspire for the “ideal world”, but don’t forget to live in the “real world”. 

3. The harder the hurdles you need to overcome, the more satisfying the victory. 

4. It takes courage to always tell the truth. But it’s always worth it. 

5. There is no creativity without vulnerability, and no innovation without a tolerance for failure. (Thanks Brené Brown.)

6. Don’t use a Tide stain-remover pen on furniture in front of a toddler. “I draw on couch too!” Accepting advice on how to explain that one….

7. Starting your own business can give you more career satisfaction than you imagined possible. 

8. Nothing breaks tension like laughter.

9. Hire to your weaknesses (and that includes laundry and housework).

10. Surround yourself with people who value integrity.

11. Distance is no barrier to real friendships. 

12. Say no sometimes. 

13. Parenting is the hardest job you’ll ever have (but it will be your greatest teacher).

14. Wine helps. 

15. You won’t always know the end game. But as long as each decision made along the way feels right, you’ll find your way.

16. Loving more than you ever knew was possible is the best feeling in the world.

17. Cereal is its own food group and can legitimately count as a toddler dinner on a hard day (or any day). 

18. Listen more and talk less. 

19. If you can’t shake an idea, it’s probably because it’s a good one. 

20. Fresh linen on a freshly made bed is one of the simple pleasures in life. 

21. Anxiety, sickness and exhaustion are all ways your body is trying to tell you it’s time to take a break.

22. You don’t need to be a firestarter. It’s okay to kindle the fire that’s already been lit. 

23. Send more handwritten cards and letters. 

24. Movement is my meditation. Being outdoors and surrounded by the natural environment is a cure all. 

25. The lengthy process of IVF will uncover emotional strength you didn’t know you had. (Hang in there!)

26. White space doesn’t just appear in life. You need to make room for it. 

27. A night out dancing with girlfriends is good for the soul. 

28. Never underestimate how appreciated the smallest of gestures can be. 

29. You are not the voice in your head. 

30. Honest storytelling is the key to effective communication. Give me honesty over perfection anyday.

31. A loving family you can’t wait to spend time with is something to treasure.

32. To find balance you have to keep moving. 

33. We can do hard things. (Thanks Glennon Doyle.)

34. Make time to make memories. 

35. Never stop learning.